The Wake Up Call

Hello, It's actually been a while. 

Been a busy bee these past few months and just embarked on some new things so that's been taking most of my time. But not to worry I'm getting my mojo back. 

Just got a few things on my mind I'd like to share. How's my year been? So far well it's been nothing short of great actually. Had a few bumps here and there but that hasn't put me down.

Since the loss of my sister I must admit things haven't remained the same. 

But it's been a year now and I'm tired of making excuses for every bad decision I've made. She'll even tell me off for doing such knowing her :). 

You know it's so convenient to fall back on grief. It's like a cocoon shielding you, and you think you are dealing with the pain and covering up whatever emotion you are feeling. But in reality you're causing more harm than good. Slowly fading from reality, it's a lot of bad energy pent up inside of you and you are stuck in what I can only call a loop. Same habits, same routine.

Loop Infinity

(I'm going to use programming terms here so I will try my best to make it as simple as possible). In programming we have something called a while loop, in the while loop we have a code embedded within braces which is meant to do whatever you program it to do. 

Now to terminate this while loop an end statement needs to be added otherwise the code will run into infinity and you will not get to your actual result. 

My point here is falling back on grief and using it as an umbrella for unacceptable and terrible decisions will only go on as long as you want it to unless you terminate it with your actions and decide it's time to come back to reality. Because life must still go on like it or not. 

In life some things are beyond our control, so sometimes it's best to just accept things for what they are and move on. Otherwise everything will just be a drag.

I think I have now reached the acceptance stage of the loss of my sister. I've gone through anger and denial. Now I'm going to 'choose' to accept it and move on. Because I know it's what she would've wanted. It's high time I stop hiding behind grief. It hurts to know she's no longer here but she's in a better place.

While she was alive she won a lot of souls, she challenged a lot of people so why should I be grieving. What I'm I doing to guarantee my own place in the kingdom of God. Sometimes I forget my goal on this earth. I'm not here to just occupy space and sail through life like the owner of it won't be asking for it one day. I need to leave my mark, make an impact.

Heaven rejoices when souls are won into the kingdom of God. It's time to wake up. Whatever it is that you are going through, go on your knees and take it to The Lord. He always has time for you. 

Each day is a new day and opportunity to work on my walk with God and get right with him. I'm not perfect and yes I'm human but he said we should come to him as we are. He's not looking for a perfect soul, just one that is ready to serve him without inhibitions. No limits. 

I know this is something different but I just had to share it :)

 Peace and Love x